1/20/22

Woah, it's been a while hasn't it. Nothing really interesting has been happening, so nothing to update the blog about. Just, generally getting firewood, checking the chickens, et cetera et cetera. I am trying to pass the time until it's an appropriate time to start garden seedlings indoors in my agricultural zone, which seems like a million years away...I want to try to be more organized this year and plant more accordingly to my zone to get the maximum amount of produce out of the year, but that is also very complicated due to climate change, and it's not as if the guidelines are very reliable, but, I suppose that's how it is, there's always something... Woah, anyway, I digress. As it is, I'm very, very bored. And nothing interesting happens, ever. Ever! So, outside of basic chores, I've been trying to just, pass the time by watching videos, TV, scrolling websites and social media, and also working out. In other words, I've kind of just been a stale potato chip, hanging out with my pet bird, being all leisurely. I'm jealous of zones that can grow all year round. There's absolutely nothing at all that would grow here, during winter. There is no such thing as overwinter planting. No such thing as winter coverage crops, or anything like that. Every single thing is dead. I've been watching a lot of videos of Self Sufficient Me, a gardener who lives in Australia, who has the benefit of gardening all year round, even if he has to cycle crops. Well...Anyway. For someone who doesn't really have interesting to write about daily, I ramble a lot.
Just popping in to say I'm still here, just chilling. I might order chinese food this week. I want creamy coconut shrimp...

1/15/22

Oh my god. I have had the worst past day. I am so grumpy. Okay, I'm actually just grumpy still over one thing that happened yesterday. I had to haul a bunch of firewood in yeah? And when I was trying to get the cart into the house to actually dump it next to the wood stove where it was easily accessible, I could NOT get it over the door frame. You see, I only have one pair of shoes and they have less traction on snow than a pair of socks on a waxed floor. So I pushed, and I pulled, it's just a TINY metal bump, that little metal ridge on the bottom of the frame, and I could not fucking get it over. I couldn't use my actual strength to pull or push it over, because when I did, I'd lose my footing and just slide in place, which was really dangerous when you're trying to bear the weight of a heavy ass cartload of wood that weighs well over a hundred pounds. If you slip and that thing falls on you, it's going to fucking break bones.
So rather than risk breaking my leg or something, I got pissed and started unloading the cart by hand, and I had to take several trips just to get enough wood inside of the house. The metal cart was also still tipped over blocking the door and I was sick of bumping into it with my foot, so I picked the whole thing up and threw it off several feet into the air away from the house. (Throwing it that high and hard was not necessary but I was pretty mad at this point.) Completely defeated by some cheap tennis shoes and a layer of snow, it was pretty dehumanizing. If only I had some work boots What would I have done if we so much as had a light ice storm?? Just a couple of inches of snow at that point, and I couldn't even push the cart in it. Useless shoes. I did have some extra money to spend this week, but it wasn't even enough to get a pair of shoes. But I knew I probably wouldn't be able to spend that a week from now, so I figured I'd treat myself, but all I could think about was the shoes I needed and nothing else seemed a comparable use of the money. I ended up spending my entire night just trying to figure out what wouldn't be a complete waste of it. And I failed.

1/15/22

I've been using old boxes to make a paper mache 'box shelf' to store random things on LOL. It worked out surprisingly well. I wonder, how do you keep cardboard from bowing a bit under paper mache. It would almost look legitimate if it didn't look like a van gogh painting. Maybe I'll paint it and make it part of the room, put my tabletop miniature figures on it. I have a few of them, I think they're cool. Ghoulies and dragons, demons, wolves, spiders, gargoyles.

1/14/22

>Hello, hello. I've been getting ready for this winter storm to come, they've named it, strangely enough. They don't usually do that. It's called "Izzy."
(Izzy? From...blIZZard? lol)
My mom seems doubtful that it will snow a lot, because it never snows as much as they claim. And when it does snow in excess, it's usually not predicted at all. I brought in some firewood expecting a blizzard though, even hoping it will move further south than us and skim past us. I don't really want to deal with it.
Meanwhile, I'm still here binging digimon and posting en masse on my new digimon fan blog lol...Chilling here with my bird Quincy who has definitely perked up over the past day. She is currently vigoriously preening herself after a shower. She is making quite the mess of my desk. There are corn bread crumbs everywhere.

1/13/22

>I think my cockatiel is sick? I don't really know what's going on. I woke up to her making strange noises like she was crying, as if she were in pain. So I checked her over in a panic and she was shivering, he feathers all puffed up. I can hardly get her to eat, but she is drinking water. She's still lucid, if very tired, and doesn't seem like she's completely suffering, but she definitely looks like she doesn't feel too great, and is weak. I don't really understand what's going on. We don't have any exotic vets that I could take her to, and my local one that sees a variety of animals (due to the livestock around here) refuses to see birds because he doesn't like them.

>I think I overreacted how bad Quincy's (that's her name) cold was...she only seems to be minorly sick haha. I hope it passes soon. I've been giving her extra attention lately, carrying her around the house in my hand like she is an ice cream cone. She likes to be manhandled like that, for some reason. I wonder if it's comfortable to by curled up in a fist. She's currently loafing on my shoulder.

1/12/22

I have terrible news, apparently while I was sleeping, the rabbits(?) Or perhaps maybe the dog had again dislodged their feed container from the cage, leaving an opening for them to escape. Two of the baby rabbits did, and my dog Pepperjack played with them, and I think she scared them to death. My mom found them in the yard dead. They weren't actually hurt in any way, as Pepper is not really a violent dog, however she gets overly excited so what I think happened was when she saw them, she tried to play with them by running with them, and the sight of her worked them up to the point of giving themselves a heart attack. My dad assures me that it isn't my fault, as the rabbits are his, and the food container dislodging from the cage has happened before and I had notified him about it, and it is technically his responsibility to maintain their hutches and things like this. However I feel like if I had personally investigated what to do about it and fixed it myself, or at least woke up earlier today, I could have caught them before anything bad had happened. Even though their care is not 'technically' my responsibility, I definitely could have done something about it to prevent this, and consider it partially my fault. I had grown rather attached to them too.

1/11/22

>I woke up from the dead of sleep with a particularly horrible nightmare. I still thought it was real for a good few minutes after I woke up. My hearts still pounding, I feel like I can't breathe.

The more I've participated in growing food, the research I've done, and the time I've spent working with agriculture, the more I'm becoming convinced that "food waste" is a fabricated issue...
Food is not really a limited resource. It's not hard to grow so long as you have the time invested in it, and the experience doing it. There will always be places that have been capable of putting out enough food even while others have experienced setbacks.
Today you see, I've read an article about switching up expiration dates with 'best by' date to help prevent food waste. And while I'm like, in favor of this, of course any potential to consume something that will have otherwise have been wasted is not a bad thing.
But there isn't a REAL loss if that milk were have to gone off the shelf at that point. And even further, it lessens the time that it will have been of use in someone's home after buying it. What people ACTUALLY mean when they say 'food waste' is when food is thrown out right after production, intentionally preventing it from ever reaching the hungry people that need it, because it's not profitable.
Throwing out old milk, even if it's still edible at that point, is not the 'food waste' that people are talking about. What is real food waste is farmers sowing vegetables back into the ground because they grew too much, or it can't be sold for as much as they'd like, and then spraying herbicides to make sure it's completely destroyed and can never grow back, which furthermore, contaminates the food that we end up eating with dangerous chemicals that shouldn't have ever been there, some with ties to cancer.
This is why you end up with things like leftover herbicides in your oatmeal. I think that all of these articles about things like prolonging shelf life of milk has no benifit to anyone other than a store making a profit, and hindering the use of the product to the people who buy it, while industrial farms destroy tons and tons of food that could have fed hungry people.
Food will always grow back. The issue is that the people growing it are witholding it. There will always be a gallon of milk to replace what was thrown out. Food literally grows on trees. And comes out of the ground.
It can be replaced. I'm not sure why people seem to believe that pricing gallons of milk the same while shortening shelf life helps 'prevent food waste.'
Typically the reason that a hungry person could not buy this food was because of the cost.
What different does it make, if you don't do anything about THAT? The food is not going to get to that person if you sell it as you were, just past it's expiration date. I end up throwing out food I grow every year, a lot of it, because there's not enough people around to eat it. And you know, I don't feel bad about that. It goes to compost, to feed the chickens, and there will always be more of it. There will always be more than enough, waiting for people to eat it, I practically beg them to take it for free.
So, no, I think food waste is a myth. There is always enough food, the problem is getting it to the people who need and want it, which is purposely prevented by producers in the name of profit. Anyway, something I've been thinking about.
Also, I should mention, even though we are capable of producing plenty to feed everyone right now, pretending as if we don't and destroying the evidence when money can't be made off of it, climate change is steadily changing that tune. So, I wonder how the country will behave when food scarcity is real, when we can't even distribute it when we have it out of greed.

1/7/22

>It's very cold. Pipes were frozen this morning. 6 degrees rn base temp, -6 windchill. Stay cozy out there, folks

>A girl I know got into a car accident tonight, sent her family to the hospital, and her little brother died. 'got into a car accident' is such an insidious way to say that an irresponsible semi driver barreled straight into their vehicle. Horrible, very sad. Those things are death traps. May the driver live with having killed a child for the rest of his life.

1/6/22

>It's FREEZING in here. My heater's struggling to keep my room warm. Windchill is -1 atm which could be worse, I guess. We're probably low on firewood right now too and I am DREADING going out to get more. Maybe later....maybe later...

>I got a crazy story for you today. I just heard that at a distant school, an adult marched onto a school bus and started beating the shit out of one of the students with a can inside of a sock. Just beat the shit out of them, almost beat them to death. And like the bus driver just sat there and watched, and other kids started beating the shit out of the kid too. Then the bus driver just continued the route as normal and dropped the poor kid off at the school. The cops are still looking for the person that did it. Is it just a universal experience for bus drivers to not give a shit about the well being of children?
I remember that mine would try to repeatedly kick me off the bus and leave me stranded miles away from home w/ no phone and my parents at work, because she didn't want me to bring my band instrument on the bus. I had to bring it home so I could go to band concerts the next day, but the bus driver didn't want me to so she'd try to leave me stranded at the school in the middle of corn fields with no way to get home. I get that they don't get paid enough to care but have some like, fucking common human decency lol. Who the hell leaves a 13 year old stranded in the middle of nowhere. And this one just let an adult on the bus to physically assault a child and didn't even give a shit. What's also crazy is that I'm not even hearing anything about this anywhere other than my local news. It's crazy right? Someone barging onto a bus to beat the shit out of a child would typically be in the news right? Crazy.

>The power keeps flickering, but fortunately hasn't gone out (yet.) I'm not sure what we'd do if it did, it would be dangerous to run the wood stove without the electric fan regulating it's temperature, it could start a fire. And it alone wouldn't be enough to heat the house, w/o the individual heaters in each room. I also need to go out and finally get more firewood, I've been putting it off long enough. My brother was supposed to help, but he got pissed at mom so he's out hanging out in the city and won't come home, so I guess it's up to me. I don't really mind though, it's not the bringing extra that bugs me, it's having to go out in this cold at all which I would've had to do regardless. I've had another cup of coffee and as soon as I finish my dinner, eurgh...I guess I'll go.

>A couple of little kids were peering over eachother watching me haul firewood so I made the point to carry 3 large pieces on each shoulder. My back hurts now but no price is too big to look cool to little kids. Ow, though. I wonder if they're the same ones I passed a couple of dozen eggs to, to give to their mom. She came back at one point to ask for another dozen to bake a birthday cake. They're always hanging around there trying to peer over to get a glimpse at our chickens, so it could be.

1/5/22

>Holy jeez-This wind! Woke me up this morning, battering at the walls. You know, I haven't really typed anything interesting here on the blog page lately. But, my day-to-day life really isn't that interesting. Maybe I'll tell you a story. Maybe the water rattlesnake story.
Before the pandemic hit, I would go out camping every year with my family, and I think it was the last time we went. We go camping on a campgrounds with a very large lake. It's an alright trip expenses wise, it's like, $20 to reserve a spot for primitive camping, $40 with electric, around $60 with a camper. Definitely doable for us.
It's an exceptional spot with tons of hiking trails in deep forest, and crawling with raccoons of which give it it's nickname, 'Raccoon Lake.'
Although other animals frequent it, like deer, which I've encountered up close a few times.
And some of them, I came to find last trip, were actually a little bit dangerous, LOL!
This past trip we went, my sister came with us with her two little girls. The lake was closed due to excess rain and flooding. My family still wanted the girls to have a chance to play in the water, so we went to the dock parking lot, where less than a foot of water had overflowed, so they can splash around in it just a little bit for fun.
While they were playing in the water, I saw an overturned section of a log that was pretty close to their feet, and kind of started eyeing it suspiciously.
So, I went up to it, and turned it over. And there underneath it coiled up defensively, was a light-colored snake with stark black spots all over it. I've never seen one like it before. I kind of leaned over it and just made shooing motions with my hands, and it darted off, its body zipping back and forth as it swam into deeper water to escape. I didn't find out what it was until later, whoops. It was a baby Massasuaga, one of the most venomous snakes that can be found in my state. It was a baby, so I'm not sure how dangerous it was, but we were in a secluded wooded area with no cell signal and no way to call for help if anyone had gotten bitten, which would definitely have turned out poorly if a, say, small child got nipped on the ankle, splashing right next to it unaware. I don't know why I felt inclined to investigate underneath the log that day, but I feel like if nobody had, someone would've gotten bitten and that camping trip would've ended in the ER. In hindsight we should have reported the sighting to the rangers, but I didn't think of it.
The Massasuaga does have a tiny rattle as rattlesnakes usually do, but it's actually almost completely devolved use of it, and it can't make any noise louder than a hum,
so it would be hard to identify as a rattlesnake if you weren't aware of it (which I wasn't,) and it was small enough and far enough from me that I didn't recognize the shape of it's head.
Anyway, when you go playing in water, don't forget to check under nearby debris.

>Something really interesting I've read just now, they think that this "long-covid" that continues to cause symptoms and breathing problems long after initial infection (not including cases w/ permanent lung damage) is due to a sort of developed auto-immune disorder that covid has caused. Which makes sense, considering that the immune reaction to covid is what caused the most danger of permanent damage and death. Whether permanent or not is unclear, but an auto-immune disorder is more managable than the people getting the essential death sentence that they now have something like COPD, like my uncle. Something curious to read about, in the future.

1/4/22

>Happy tornado test tuesday. (tornado siren blaring in background)

>Today while I fed the chickens some kitchen scraps, I noticed something. Most of the ground's frozen, but you know that layer of morning frost, that is usually melted off the surface by the sun later in the day? Well, the tall fence around the yard casts a shadow, so there was a perfect straight line where the sun didn't touch that was still covered in a layer of white frost. "Huh, cool!" Is what I thought. I then sat in here with my bird, feeding her single seeds one by one by hand like I were feeding a king grapes. She likes to steal sips out of my drinks, hopping onto cups and diving her head right into them. She thought that my wax burner sitting on my desk was a cup and jumped onto it, shoving her face in it, confused to find a light bulb instead. (It was turned off, don't worry.) I thought it was pretty funny.

>The pain from the exposed nerve in my tooth was particularly excruciating today. I don't think I've really talked about it much on here because it's a very sore subject. And I'm probably not going to mention it much again otherwise in passing, but. To clear it up in the future, long story short, I've always had awful dental health because I grew up on leaded water and some of my teeth came in decayed while the rest didn't come in as strong and healthy as adult teeth typically would. I just have some metabolism issues and don't process things as efficiently, particularly calcium among other things. I take a lot of supplements now so it's less of an issue, but it's caused like, pretty severe erosion in my teeth as I grew up. I had a dentist that capitalizez on it and lied to me giving me poorly fitted tooth caps on my healthier teeth that I didn't need (while ignoring the ones that actually needed dental care), which destroyed the rest of the molars in half of my mouth and they broke off after only like a year, leaving the nerves exposed. It also put my family thousands of dollars in debt. I only found out that that particular clinic was known for fraud after the fact. Now I can't even drink w/o a straw because anything that touches the nerve just well, have you ever had a broken tooth with an exposed nerve or anything like that?? Surely you have at least once. You should know what it's like for something to touch an exposed nerve, it's kind of indescribable isn't it? It's like your brain just sort of short circuits LOL. Nerves weren't really meant to be exposed liek that, so it's like your brain doesn't know how to process it. If you haven't experienced it yet, you probably will some day, eventually.
Anyway, the pain will only get worse while the tooth erodes being exposed, until eventually the nerve will die, and my face will sink in from the teeth being gone. I try to ignore it and not think about it because it makes each day feel like a waking nightmare. But it's kind of hard to ignore when it constantly hurts. What helps me get through it for now is that there is an independent company I know of that makes vampire prosthetics LOL. When I lose enough of my teeth, I want to get some...

If you judge anyone for their teeth, or anything appearance wise at all for that matter, you are worth less than the chicken shit on my boots. Even that can help grow an entire garden. I doubt anyone like that would be capable of even half as much.

1/3/22

I'm feeling significantly better now, I think. I've managed to stay awake most of the day today and yesterday, so the fatigue is probably behind me now, aside from my usual shameful napping habits...anyhow, it's dropped to pretty low temps today, so I've mostly been sitting in watching Lucifer, and wondering when I should get plant starters started. Last frost is typically second or third week of April on average. And, plants reach maturity between 30 to 60 days depending on the type of plant, so either the beginning of March or even halfway through February would probably be decent enough. They would technically be able to blossom by the first couple of weeks of April. However I could start them as early as I'd like for just, fun's sake if I want to. It's not like plants growth will be stunted if they reach maturity before planting outside, they'll just simply grow to adjust to their new surroundings after being transplanted. So, maybe in the coming weeks I'll get some starters going, if I can get the motivation. First I'll have to sterilize the potting soil, though. The bag I have out in the garage has been contaminated and I had issues with damping off last year. I can treat it with heat and there will probably be no problems.

1/2/22

I've spent the time while I was awake the past couple of days getting firewood with my brother. I think I might've mentioned that at some point...But anyway, it's because the temperature was supposed to dip this week, hitting 10-15 below zero. I woke up this morning, and it had snowed, and the back door was frozen shut. It's crazy, it was fifty degrees outside just a day ago. Welcome to January.

>I just learned that my sister's been in the hospital all night.

1/1/22

>Well, first post of '22...Just another day in hell. I'm pretty sure I have covid LOL. I think that's why I've basically been in a coma for three days. I slept through dinner twice...sleeping all night and sleeping most of the day too. And last night the flu symptoms showed up. Pretty mild, I just have a horrible headache, a near 100 degree fever on and off, a cough, and fatigue. I'll just sleep it off...I've been doing a pretty good job of that, I think. Second thing, I made a STUPID impulse purchase last night, I bought Honk, a fun eye-tracking simple Vtuber program. Am I too shy to ever actually post a full video? ...Yes. But...I like it...I think it's neat...Maybe I'll post a clip using it every now and then. I think maybe doing website CSS tutorials and stuff with it would be fun, some time. I can talk you through how to make a website theme like this. Anyway, what was I going to say...there was something else...rIGHT! It's january!! Vanitas no carte continues this month, right? Right?!? When? When? I gotta look it up! I can't wait to see the beast of gevaudan!

>I can't taste things anymore RIP. Was halfway through my dinner today thinking it tasted hella funny when I realized what was off was that I could hardly taste it at all. Was askin my family all confused like "This taste funny to you??"

12/31/21

>I guess I should write about it, because not mentioning it would be dishonest. I'm ashamed to admit that I've slept for almost two days straight. I've only been awake a few hours throughout the past few days to the point that my dad climbed up to my room to check if I was dead LMAO. Whatever fatigue I had I hope I've worked out of my system by now. I'm awake now...I'm awake now...I promise!

>Anyway, I can't wait for the new season of Vanitas no Carte to come out next month...I'm beyong excited! Sherlock holmes but with vampires...Best show ever!

>Supposedly, it's going to drop 10-15 below zero in the next couple of days. (Even though it was in the fifties today. I'll see it when I believe it. Stupid unpredictable weather.) Anyway, me and my brother got a bunch of firewood, and while I was hauling wood on the cart, I got my thumb between pieces and now I have a blood bruise on my thumb. Hurts like heeeell!

12/30/21

>Still trying to wrap my mind around whatever fucking sorcery insulated tumbler cups are. I made coffee three hours ago, how is it still too hot to drink!! Fucking incredible. Why is nobody talking about this?

>I finally threw out my guitar. Well, I didn't throw it out. I just bagged it and all the parts and put it into storage where it'll never be seen or used again, and I'll never be able to afford to fix it or replace it. It fucking crushes me but I have to get it out of the way because I can't even stand to clean my room seeing it on the floor. Hopefully maybe now I'll be able to forget about it sometimes.

12/29/21

>I've been pretty much confining myself to my room because I don't want to catch it from my brother. It suuucks. I thought I usually spend most of my time in here anyway, but I guess it turns out I don't, I usually frequently wander around. Now my legs are all stiff. I've been passing the time by fiddling around with old voice synth stuff, and figured I'd make a character using a voicebank I recorded for fun. But, I forgot how time consuming it actually was. Going through every single note, navigating the pitch bends so that they'd bend how I'd imagine them to if I were to actually sing it. Rendering it all piece by piece, mixing the outcome. Terriiible! I think it'll be a long time before I actually make a page for this.

>I used to hear that you always dream, you just don't remember it when you wake up. Aside from the fact that that's been proven to not be true by monitoring brainwaves while people sleep, I always remember a dream when I have one, I could tell you that much. You don't forget as soon as you wake up, even if you forget, it's from the memory fading throughout the day.
I used to have a lot of nightmares, growing up. I'd Wake up with night terrors and sleep walk and hallucinate until someone would wake me. I wouldn't remember sleep walking, but I remember every part of every dream I had. I still do, I remember every one of them. I remember every good dream, too, but I hardly ever dreamt just to dream. Now, I rarely EVER dream. I fall asleep and I just don't exist anymore. I like it better that way, but it always feels way too short. It's why I hate falling asleep. Sometimes though, I still have a nightmare every now and then. I think the weirdest ones are when you can't even form a proper dream, but you wake up to a feeling of terror and you can't place it. It's like your mind was too lazy to even come up with something creative, and decided to just throw around some chemicals in your brain and call it a day. I half-ass things, even in my sleep.

12/28/21

>My brothers brought covid home with him again, for like the third time. If it's the original strain, we can probably catch that one again. We haven't had the most recent omicron variant yet either. But if we did have the delta strain a couple months ago, we're probably still immune to that one. First time, he brought it home from school, second time might've actually been dad bringing it from work, I'm not sure. And third, my brothers running around and working unmasked, and he brought it back from hanging out at someone's house and her mom has it. So, we're probably going to all get it again now if he doesn't just confine himself to his room for a week or two, which I doubt he'll actually do. I hope it's not the original variant. My cough never went away from that. About to just permanently lock him out of the house, he's like a fucking plague rat. At least we only ever go out to see relatives, who also never go out either. And here he is running around going to packed movie theaters and not even wearing a mask at work. Stay the hell away from me.

>My mom has a broken wisdom tooth and keeps fucking whining about it. I'm sick of it. I've had an exposed nerve since march, you think I give a shit? I'm not even allowed to complain about it, because when I was in pain I got mocked for it. You can't eat on that side of your mouth because it hurts a little bit? So what. I can't eat on the other side of my mouth because all of my molars are gone. Because I've done this multiple times for each one of them because you could never be bothered to take me to get a single fucking root canal. Maybe grow the fuck up a bit. I don't want to hear it at all. Maybe someone would have cared once if you weren't such a hypocrite. Waah, waah, my face hurts!! Sucks when it's you, doesn't it?

12/27/21

>Up bright and early again today. Nevermind it's because I don't sleep LOL. At what point does night and early morning person blend together? I got a couple of hours, slept from midnight to 3 something in the morning. Can't stop thinking about things that keep me up. The tape on my glasses is also getting looser I've noticed, they keep tilting to the side on my face. I have a pretty severe astigmatism in one eye so when it's not lined up my visions all warped. It's a bit disorienting. I wonder when I'll be able to get new ones. Next month, maybe. Would it be too early to make a cup of coffee?

>I can't wait for the next chapter of Vanitas no Carte to come out...

12/26/21

I'm watching Don't Look Up. It made me cry. Was it even supposed to be satirical? Because it's not an exaggeration. Watching it was just a reflection of reality. We're looking down the face of climate change and there's no hope to change it. I mean, there is, but there isn't. Not for what we are. For the same reasons there's no hope to change the outcome in the movie, either. If you watch it you'll see what I mean. We're at the point where you can see it, up in the sky. We've already had plenty of chances to divert it, and you can see it now, more than a speck, and still nobody bothers looking at it. People keep lying and saying it isn't there. Even though if you'd just look up you'd see it. They had the data for it, and nobody believed it. And now that we can see it, politicians twiddle their thumbs and lie for personal gain. Corporations, business people continue to leech as much money as they can. Solo billinaires just find a way to escape it, as if it were possible. And the people who see it are trying so so hard, but without collective support it's not enough. People don't even realize the urgency of it. So we watch it unfold together, instead, and do our best to support eachother, knowing the tragedy that something could've been done about it if enough people had cared. The same can be said for a lot of things too, like the pandemic.

This 'tumbler' cup keeps stuff scalding hot for HOURS. How?? How does that work?? I can make coffee, feed the animals, and come back in and it'll still be too hot to drink. It's like magic!! magic!

>I heard a coyote uncomfortably close to the edge of town.

>my mom's not allowed to be the one to set up streaming accounts anymore, she literally just got hbomax and immediately forgot all of the credentials for it so we can't use it. She kept trying to give us an email address when it's attached to her at&t account, which uses a user ID. There is no email involved in the account creation process for HBOmax provider accounts. She does not know the user ID or the password to her AT&T account either. That's now two streaming services we own that are completely inaccessible. I'm pissed

12/25/21

>Shit...I made coffee with the full intention of staying up until it was a reasonable time to sleep, but I ended up passing out and sleeping for six hours, and now its only three AM. I already got enough sleep to last me into the next afternoon and its only 3 am...
Well, anyway, merry christmas!
Although, I'm not celebrating at all today, ironically. Maybe I'll just eat cookies and watch christmas movies~
Now that all of these holidays are over though, I need to get back into working out. I had gotten depressed at one point and fallen out of it, but I miss it. I've gained weight I don't want, and I've lost most of my muscle already...I still have some from firewood, but not nearly as much as before. I need to set up a routine again.

>I read that rabbits lick you because they trust you a lot. These baby bunnies are trying to groom me LOL. Falling asleep and curling up in my hands after I've only known them for what, a week? To be loved so unconditionally by rabbits.

12/24/21

>Life is so boring...I'm sick of it. A note to my future self: You already had breakfast. You just forgot. Your mind is a sick sick liar. I know it's hard to keep track because you're never really hungry, but you already ate. It was a couple spoonfuls of cottage cheese and crackers with a cup of coffee. Don't try grabbing toast or something later. ~Your former self

>I went to my sisters for her christmas party, and got to check out her new house for the first time. It's HUGE! She says she got it for $70k. It's a very old house, and wasn't in the best condition when she bought it, so she got it for a cheaper price and did a lot of work on it, and it looks amazing. I'm jealous...She has way more land than us too. She even gave me a christmas present, I got a re-usable tumbler with "eco-friendly" straws. Aka...Just a re-usable stainless straw set, hahaha. I already had bought myself one at one point, but these ones will fit the tumbler cup I got. I'm going to make some coffee in it now, since it's a bit too early to sleep and I'm exhausted...She was giving everyone hugs as we got ready to leave and I snuck past her, but she snuck up on me and divebombed me with a hug so hard that it knocked the wind out of me. I was like, aaaaah! Help!!
My nieces were super focused on being good hostesses. They kept a dry-erase board to sign our names on like we were visiting some sort of high class restaurant. They asked all of us to sign so they could count the number of "guests," and of course, we all obliged, which was pretty funny. My grandparents got them stuffed carebears. I remember being super into them too as a child, I remember having the stuffed blue gloomy one with the raincloud on his stomach, but I can't remember what his name was. Maybe his name was just plain Grumpy?

12/23/21

>I already feel a lot better. But I slept horribly and woke up in a bad mood. I feel full of energy compared to yesterday! Or maybe I've just lost my mind from only having gotten two hours of sleep. Oh well.

>Going on fucking what, week 3 where I've had to bathe w/ cold water and no shampoo? I'm about to fucking scalp myself, my heads so dry and itchy. And I'm freezing...

>The baby rabbits have gotten so big, already! They still fit in the palm of my hand, but they're big enough to move around on their own now. They're so soft, too. Kind of jumpy towards me, but hopefully some regular interaction will help that.

>After writing that, I got one of them out and had him in my lap on my bed, but I ended up falling asleep for a couple of hours, and when I woke up, he was flopped over sleeping next to me hehehe. He kept snuggling his head into my elbows, and licking my fingers. I must've still had caramel on them.

12/22/21

>What the hell...I just woke up at 4 am with a low-grade fever (99.6).
Hopefully it'll clear up in a couple of days. I don't really feel that sick, I just have a headache and feel kind of sluggish, dizzy, and vacant. I don't think it could possibly be covid, I was just at my grandparents a couple days ago and haven't gone out at all prior to that, and nobody else is sick. Probably just a cold. I don't think I'll be able to get back to sleep for a while feeling like this. It's likely what woke me up in the first place. I'll just make some tea, and maybe read a bit. I still haven't finished the Bone Weaver's Orchard. I'm not really that avid of a reader, but I'll stop to read a single chapter every now and then. Things like that fail to capture my attention.

>Well, its already past 7 and I still haven't fallen back asleep, so I guess it's time for coffee. I was already planning on staying in bed today, but if this chill in the house is any indication, I'm probably going to have to get more firewood anyway. Oh, well.

>I mostly just lounged around today...aside from feeding the animals and getting firewood. I laid in bed and fell asleep for a while, watched some aggretsuko, and made a new site page theme...my fever went back down to normal throughout most of the day, but it's back up now. Anyway, though...I'm pretty proud of this new blog page theme. It looks cool, right? Right?
Oh, right...I almost forgot. I also started using Soulseek this morning, too. I had downloaded it a while back but I couldn't get it to connect...and I read on the main page when I reinstalled it that the previous server was shut down and the past version no longer worked, which must have been what had happened. So, I reinstalled it with high hopes that it would work this time, and it did. So, be sure to download some of my data at @seraphxo. (It's my old account username, because that's how long ago I tried to use it previously.)

>My dad gave me some "Wickedly Habanero" cheese from a company called Cabot. It's delicious! Usually 'pepper' cheeses have no real spice at all, only the hint of a taste of pepper...But this one was actually a bit hot, refreshingly so. After a day full of headaches and fatigue, it cleared my head a bit. I want some more...

12/21/21

>I feel like the end of a year is a betrayal. I get so excited, anticipating that it's going to be over, and still, when december passes and january is here, nothing changes, the last week of frost is still two months away, and I can't actually do anything still. What even designates the end of a year. By the end of the year the season hasn't changed, nothing is different, nothing has even actually ended at all. It's just a signifier of time passed, and time isn't even real. It's so annoying...

>Help, mein gott, going to all of these thanksgiving and then christmas parties, these peoples white people tastes are spreading to me. I can eat deviled eggs now and don't immediately recoil. Mayonnaise or miracle whip thrown into random shit and calling it salad doesn't make me vomit anymore. I actually kind of like pasta salad and shrimp salad. My favorite desserts are sugar cookies and rice ambrosia. I have the taste of a midwest 50's housewife. Someone take the shot before I start putting gelatin in things and selling tupperware to my neighbors

12/20/21

>I know, I'm up uncharacteristically early, at 7 am. I slept more lightly last night it seems like. I knew if I went back to sleep by now, I probably would sleep well into noon, so I just went ahead and got up...Made some coffee and breakfast, and took a double dose of vitamins in the hopes that it would keep me awake throughout the day. Wonder what I should do with all the extra time. I'll probably fall back asleep anyway.
Oh, also I lied that my grandparents was the last, I'm also going to my sisters for christmas at her house too.

>I'm so sick of nails and rivets that melt like putty when you so much as look at them. 'steel,' huh? our walls are nailed together with playdo. It's fucking alarming that you barely tap them and they bend at 180 degree angles. I go through like ten nails trying to nail in one. These nails holding everything together are extremely unstable. Someone should look into this, before modern homes start caving in.

12/19/21

>I ordered it...I ordered a drop spindle! I'm kind of excited... I've been researching this morning how to use them, and I'm happy to find that they seem exceptionally easy, actually. I wonder why everyone doesn't do this... Anyway, I had to get firewood and fed the chickens super early this morning, because I'm heading over to my grandma's for christmas. I hope she made my favorite sugar cookies...She has dementia, I'm going to be sad the day she forgets how to make them... Yet another original recipe I'll never taste again...I miss the little carrot decorated cakes that my Grandma Taylor would make. She used to pass them out on easter. We have the recipe for her red velvet cake, but I don't think I'm going to be able to eat those little easter cakes ever again.

This christmas as always was great. Even though it's not technically christmas yet...I already got my presents, and going to my grandparents is going to be the one and only celebration of it.
I got slippers...I got more memory for my PC...and I can draw digitally again. And, I ended up getting myself a drop spindle as a present to myself. The only thing left that would make it complete would be some sugar cookies and eggnog...I wish winter ended with the end of December. At this point, I'm already sick of it.

>My grandpa got me a Looney Tunes sweatshirt for christmas, hehehe. Where he found official Looney Tunes merch in 2021 I have no idea. Maybe he time traveled back to the early 2000s when literally everything was looney tunes themed.

My grandma was making fun of the present choices because my grandpa picked them out, but I unironically like it. Back when you could still watch looney tunes all the time on live TV, I would watch them all the time as a kid. Another one of the cartoons I liked a lot was Popeye the Sailor. I ate a lot of food, deviled eggs, sugar cookies...My grandparents food is kind of bland because they have to watch things like blood sugar and sodium for their health, so not lots of seasonings and stuff. However the noodles were surprisingly good...with chunks of ham, and you could tell they were boiled in broth left over from cooking the ham. They always have so many cool knick knacks all over the house. Antique perfume bottles, old tin cans of cocoa powder they don't even make like that anymore, a super old telephone that looks like its out of the movies. Not even one of the old corded telephones where you spin the dial to dial a number, it's even older than that. (Still has a spinning dial, but...It looks completely different. Something you'd see hanging on the wall in a victorian movie.) A little bit like this one. But not as fancy, with the little decorative engravings.

>Hey can I say something real quick? Recently, a 22 year old man, got a lifeterm sentence because the breaks failed in his truck and he crashed, resulting in the deaths of 4 people. Somehow, he got 27 counts including homicide, earning him a life sentence in prison.
One of my best friends in school was killed in an accident, by a combine driver who got away with it with absolutely zero repurcussions.
And I don't think that should be the case. I think you should get in trouble when you kill someone because of your own error.
However this was a mechanical failure and a complete accident, something that could not have been controled in that moment by the skill of the driver at all.
This man is only in his early 20s, he is practically a kid still. And he's just gotten a sentence to spend the rest of his life in jail over a car accident.
I think what might have also played a factor in the sentencing from the judge, is that he's a Cuban immigrant.
He is not even responsible for the state of repair of the truck, that's managed by the company he works for. They are the ones who need to be charged for failing to maintain their equipment. Please do something about it.
If you have the time, please sign this petition to try to sway the ruling.

>I'm fucking beyond pissed. Someone was just casually telling me that all of our problems would be resolved if we just fucking crowdfunded. Oh, dad needs knee surgery? Just E-beg for it. Need tens of thousands of dollars of dental work? E-beg. Why don't we just all fucking beg huh? Kneel at peopels feet for the fuckign privilege of basic healthcare? Disregard everything else or the consequences of it? Do you even hear yourself? I'm shaking I'm so fucking mad. Never fucking speak to me ever again. Words flowing like diarrhea completely ignoring everything said in response. Surely everythings just your fault because you won't just beg for it. Go to hell.

12/18/21

>I slept all day again today...sorry Q_Q
I have a little bit of money right now, so I've been trying to assess what I need the most to spend it on...
I kind of would like a glass dip pen...The walnut ink I've made isn't really suitable for refilling normal pens, it kind of leaks a bit.
But, normal metal-tipped dip pens get corroded away by natural inks. So a glass tip pen is better. They also don't seem as troublesome because you don't have to replace a nib. Still, it's not like I really actually need something like that...
But I feel like its a shame to end up spending money when I have it on nothing but socks, that I won't ever even think about when wearing.
Let me think. I don't need new work gloves right now, I don't need fabric patches, I have plenty of needles and thread, I could use some yarn for mending things like socks and sweaters though, I only have one roll.
Although a drop spindle to spin my own would be nice. I have rabbits, they shed a really nice soft fur I could use. And there's also fibrous plants, and I've even heard of people recycling dryer lint.
Now that I think about it, a drop spindle would probably be the most useful thing to get.
...And another alarm clock.
I'm going to finish my coffee and get more firewood. I'm trying to stock up, because supposedly we'll be getting a cold front soon.
...It's a shame about the dip pen though. Hey...if somebody wanted to commission me so I could get one...I wouldn't be mad heheheh...

12/17/21

I didn't really do anything interesting today, other than add a spirit hunter shrine... so there's not much to say. Oh yeah, I also packaged the layout I made for this site in case you ever want to use it.

12/16/21

I couldn't really sleep at all last night, I kept getting up and tossing around trying to sleep. But, I did at least try to close my eyes. I heard that just laying there with your eyes closed is better rest than not trying to sleep at all, and I think that's definitely true. Otherwise, I think after going entire nights without sleep, I'd feel a lot worse. (I know, I've also done that before.) I've always tended to be most awake at night and tired during the day. It's always been difficult to try to keep a "normal" circadian rythm like everyone else, I only ever achieved it with regular use of alarm clocks. I feel like a vampire. *yaaawns*
I wish I could just sleep when I'm tired and be awake when I'm awake without it causing problems. It's not fair.
On the bright side, my "24 hour flu" is gone. You know, when I was a kid, I actually thought the "24 hour flu" was an actual thing. I didn't know it was just related to food poisoning.

I finished my first actual sort of effort drawing with my new micro drawing tablet, it's on the 'art' page. I think I've gotten used to it's size, sort of. It's so cute, I bet I could fit it in a particularly big pocket. Whatever works.

I finished cleaning my desk for the first time in a long time. It's so hard to clean things. Things just build up in my room, because when I bother to look enough to clean, I see all the broken things that I used to love that I couldn't ever afford to replace. But it would break my heart to throw it away. I wonder what it's like to just be able to do the things you love to do. The things that only had minor problems, and I tried to order the parts to fix, but payments got declined or something else had to be done, so they sat in disrepair until they were no longer fixable at all. I can't look at it. Cleaning makes me sneeze.

It kind of makes me think of my playstation too, I saved up hundreds of dollars for it and then my family went in for the other half of it, but I only got to play it a little bit because the controllers only last at most a year before they break and they cost at least $40+ to replace. Another $40, on top of everything else every year. Which broken thing is worth it? You can only pick one. And that'll break next year too. It has to be holidays too, because the rest of the year is for everything else.

12/15/21

Ugh, I woke up and felt sick to my stomach the second I got out of bed. I couldn't even eat lunch. I could barely down my coffee. I wonder if I ate something funny yesterday. I've accidentally eaten recalled lettuce before...And last week, walmart also didn't give us our tomatoes because those were also recalled. How often is this going to happen? I miss summer, you don't have to worry about something giving you food poisoning when you do it yourself. But during winter all you got is junk food and listeria lettuce.
Eurgh, just thinking about frozen pizzas makes me wanna hurl.

I saw what was supposed to be like a silly tumblr post, about how much life has improved compared to your ancestors lives, bragging about being able to use whatever spices you want, being able to shower whenever you want with shampoo and conditioner and soaps, being able to go to college, having home heating, and not having to do anything much at all to just go about your daily life. It just made me depressed. You know, a pretty large number of us still can't do any of that.

12/14/21

I got some early christmas presents from family, today. One I'm super stoked about right now...Is that I got a small graphics drawing tablet. But I'm scared to take it out of the box to be honest...I don't ever want to break it. Second, I got a new memory card for my computer, because I had the feeling that my original one had started failing a bit and could no longer handle the entire load of everything on it's own...So, I had asked for a new one, and my brother helped me install that. (I'm not very good at computer hardware...well. I knew how it worked, but I'm always afraid to touch the guts of a PC lest I bump or dislodge something and can't figure out what it was.) I guess my assumption that it was the memory card going bad was right...Because it runs so much more smoothly now. Hopefully my PC's memory compression will lessen the load off of things like the CPU now, now that it doesn't have to struggle so much with memory. It's kind of weird to go from a failing memory card, to go to that, and even almost twice as fast in addition to it, because there's two of them now. Anyway...Merry early christmas. I guess I should try out the tablet and try drawing something with it. It's a lot smaller than my older one, so it will take some getting used to. And it's been a while since I've used one... I wish I could be happier about this, but it all just feels kind of dull.
Hey...Guess what model the tablet is...? 420

>Ah, that's what I thought. Unfortunately, I don't think I can even draw with this. It's way too small. I only have like a couple of inches of space to work with tied to a massive screen so the cursor just zooms all over the place. I'd have to have the hands of a surgeon...
Well...Maybe...?


Jeez. My wrist still hurts really bad. Maybe I twisted it worse than I thought.

I made a twitter I guess, to talk to myself on so these blog entries don't go pages and pages with pointless thoughts. I don't think I'm going to interact with any other tweets on there though, because that incites interaction with other people, and have you SEEN the people on twitter? No thank you.
I think I'll simply tie any social media to my site with the site as the center like I did last time. Although there's a couple I can't actually use, because you need a phone to use them, like facebook and instagram. I'm not really interested in those two either way.

I took a shower, and we're out of shampoo, so I had to use normal soap to clean my scalp...It dried out my hair so much I had to condition it a couple times...and the water wouldn't even get warm. It was terrible. I don't feel clean at all. When I tried combing through my hair with my fingers, it was still so dry the strands kept catching on my hands, so I had to use a conditioner cream just to comb through it...Next time, I think, it'd be better to just not wash it at all.

12/13/21

Ah, I slept most of today. Well, 'most of' doesn't sound right. I woke up at like 9 when my computer alarm went off, I think. But I fell back asleep around noon and slept until 4 something...And the sun goes down at about five, so it feels like "most of the day", doesn't it. One of our "meat rabbit"s had a litter, which has apparently been in there for a week, and I hadn't noticed. I'll have to check the nesting box when I feed them later. I didn't think she was supposed to have that litter until like next month.

I hate when people do advent calendars backwards. Why can you not just go by todays date. You want me to count backwards to the 25th day? from today? Count how many days are left? What do I look like to you? You think I can do basic math in my head? I made a code in python to periodically remind me to drink water because I forget I'm even alive.

What is it about people failing to send mail to my address...I keep trying to do trades with people, but when I send it first, I never get anything back even when they claim they sent the letter/package. And when they send it to me first, I never get it. So, I never get their address, and I'm never able to send them back what I promised either. I tried to do that back when I first started this site with another user, I was going to give them a patch, and they sent me the package first, telling me to use their address on the package. I never got it. And when I do get things they sent me something completely random instead of what I actually bought. I tried to order a pack of CDs once, for ten dollars, and they sent me a tiny board game piece shaped like a guitar instead, that couldn't have been worth more than a quarter. I couldn't even send it back for a refund, because stores only accept fedex now, and we don't have a fedex facility within miles. I think the closest one is in a city an hour away. Refunds available!...Unless you don't live in a city, I guess. That's the problem with using a random private company instead of using an actual public mail service. Tch

12/12/21

I thought I was going to break my hand for a second, while I was bringing the firewood over the door frame. I was holding the cart up with one hand, and it had to have been like, well over a hundred pounds of wood on it. Maybe nearing 200. I'm not really sure how much it weighs when loaded to it's max capacity LOL. I turned around to get the door handle to try to get the door open so I could actually haul the cart over the frame, but when I turned, my hand that was holding the cart up twisted kind of awkward, and my grip on the cart loosened, so the entire weight of the cart started to bear down on my twisted hand. I knew if I didn't let go it was probably going to break it, so I did, and had to jump back as the cart fell so it would miss my foot too. Ouch. Mental note: try to pay attention when you're hauling a completely loaded cart of wood. And maybe put it down before trying to open the door if you don't think you can hold it up with one hand. Even if you could before...different types of wood have different densities so the weight will vary a lot.

12/11/21

So long story short, there was a tornado last night, but it broke up before it could reach us. An Amazon warehouse was also destroyed....It's already all over the news. Apparently our region wasn't the only one hit, too. I guess a lot of people in kentucky, + our state, + the state next door got battered with tornadoes. They're saying it was a tornado outbreak. I feel lucky that we so much as still have electricity. Some pretty strong winds stuck around even after the storm was gone, so we're under a wind advisory now.

12/10/21

Good morning...at 4 am again!
After trying to fix my sleep schedule from sleeping half the day away, it's turned into something interesting where I sleep for only a few hours, wake up for several hours, sleep for a few hours, wake up, et cetera. I feel rested but, it's seriously annoying.

There's a massive storm on the weather radar. I only thought to check it because we got a notice from the electric company, saying that if it knocked the power out, it likely wouldn't be fixed for days.
My brother got me new slippers for christmas!

12/9/21

I ended up waking up at 3:30 in the morning, and somehow I didn't feel tired, waking up so early. I'll probably regret it later.
I need to go feed the chickens and rabbits. And probably get more firewood.

I hate people the most who say they're going to do something for everyone else when it was really all an excuse for them to hoard something for themselves. It's even worse than being a normal liar, I think.

There's been a bunch of police and people in hazmat suits in front of my sisters house all day. It turned out to be a puppy mill...they siezed around fifty dogs. I used to groom dogs, and I remember my boss telling me that there was a lot of them that operate around here in secret. Usually the same ones, because they don't get punished for it when they're caught. They just sieze the dogs from them and earn a slap on the wrist.

12/8/21

I had to get firewood because we were completely out. The cold gave me a headache.


My glasses broke... I managed to hold them together with adhesive for the time being.

12/7/21

I didn't sleep well last night. (Which is fair, because of how long I had slept the day before...)

I put off going outside to feed the chickens and rabbits most of the day because of the cold, but then it started getting dark. When I went back in the house again, the warmth of the house made my hands burn.

We're low on firewood, I'll have to get some more tomorrow.

General Peppers

Watch out which ones you plant, peppers can cross-pollinate. You decide to plant something super spicy one year, then you're going to be planting peppers just as hot every year from then on. (If you collect the seeds, anyway.) This has produced some interesting pepper combinations in my experience, we had habaneros one year with that delightful floral taste, which cross-polinated with what I suspect were jalapenos or wax peppers. The result was a smaller pepper with a tapered shape that still had that same characteristic floral taste, except it wasn't as spicy. As long as peppers get plenty of sun, they're pretty hardy, and I've even had some survive a couple of frosts. A must have for putting some spice into your food. They're DELICIOUS pickled...pickled jalapenos are one of my favorites. I also dehydrate chilis to crush and store in the spice cabinet for future use.

Butternut Squash

Low effort winter squash...requires a lot of space as it's a crawling vine. Could be woven around other plants so as to not interfere with their growth if you pay active attention to it, so you won't have to worry as much about spacing... It's a winter squash with a thick skin, so it has to be peeled before it's cooked, but lasts for quite a long time...If buffed with oil or wax to preserve it from mold, it can even keep for months. Has a smell like pumpkin, but tastes more comparable to sweet potatoes. When cooked long enough, it melts in your mouth like butter. This and the yellow color = thus the name.


Tomatoes

A garden staple...Lots of uses in everything and lots of flavor. Tastes nothing like whatever the hell they try to pass as tomatoes at a store. Unfortunately due to their popularity, can spread around lots of airborne diseases that target the plants. Most of them won't kill the plant, but can produce unsightly blemishes and cause mutations in the tomatoes. How annoying.


walnuts

The nuts are very good roasted in sugar and honey. The husks can be boiled down to make a lasting ink or dye. The shells make good firestarters. The wood is dense and burns for a long time. Harbors a mold that can be toxic to smaller animals. Should be sterilized. Has an earthy smell that can't really be defined. Crushing the nuts into coffe beans and roasting it makes for a very good coffee. (Delicious!)

Apple Trees

Similar problem with the tomatoes...Since they are such a popular fruit tree, can be a fucking hazard with disease. While a fully grown well established tree will lose not more than a branch to fireblight if an eye is kept on it, it will still spread the disease to any smaller saplings that are nothing but a branch, wiping out every other tree. Fireblight is so devastating that it can kill entire saplings in a span of three days before the disease is even noticed and can be managed. We've tried four times and each sapling has been killed by fireblight. Prioritizing the peach tree instead, due to it being a more uncommon plant in the area with less risk.


Foxglove

Soft with tiny white hairs, the leaves feel like velvet. Beautiful towers of bright flowers like drooping bells. Don't touch it without washing your hands afterwards, or wear gloves. Very poisonous. Don't use this plant for anything, it's too dangerous.


Lamb's Quarters

Also known as wild spinach, because it tastes just like spinach and has a lot of healthy vitamins and properties like it. Grows very tall with stalks that harden as it gets bigger, almost as hardy as branches of a tree, except they're hollow in the middle with a sort of foamish material. They have waxy leaves that are broad at the base and taper at the end, the uppermost younger leaves usually a faded white. The bottom of the leaves are also a faded white color... Has a mild flavor but it's a very healthy plant, so would make a good salad substitute. I'm not the biggest fan because it doesn't have much taste.


Creeping Charlie

The worst...The worst...Crawling everywhere, covering the surface of everything, snuffing out the clovers and grass. An all consuming horrible weed. Has a minty floral smell, and tiny tube-shaped purple flowers. I've spent hours on my hands and knees tearing clumps and clumps of it up, only for it to crawl back the next week. If I could I would burn all of it. Doesn't even deserve to be made into a tea.


Curly Dock

Extremely recognizable for its long leaves that are furled at the edges, it shoots up on tall stalks, and grows large bundles of dark brown seeds along them. I've heard that they're not ideal for their bitter taste...But I actually prefer it. Very yummy as a dark green in soups. You can also collect and grind the seeds to mix into flour.


Mudlavia

This is a story I heard when I was a little kid. Mudlavia was a famous luxurious hotel with a mud spa, built in the late 1800s after it was discovered by Samuel Story.
Story was a civil war veteran, who discovered the springs while digging a drainage ditch. When he drank water from the spring, he claimed that his symptoms of Rheumatism gradually disappeared.
Mudlavia's youthful springs were so popular, that notable figures visited from all over the world, just to stay at the hotel and soak in it's mud springs.
Mudlavia burned down in the early 1900s. The property was continued to be used in the form of a restaurant and home for the elderly, however that building also burned down.
It was then repurposed for a third time, yet again as a lodge, which also burned down, and then the property remained untouched, other than to bottle the spring water and sell it.
I went there in person on a tour with some other people, who if I remember correctly, told me that Mudlavia had burned down in a very similar fashion each time, the fire starting in a closet.
Although I'm not sure the validity on this other than word of mouth, because I can't really find any information on it. But, I'm not sure it really matters anyway.
The real juicy rumor about Mudlavia, is that among the famous people who stayed here, it was also a popular spot of the Dillinger Gang. And supposedly, during the hotel's operation, there was a gang shootout where various people had died, and that dead bodies were found stashed in wells on the property. Thus, Mudlavia's shell is now rumored to be haunted, and is a popular spot for amateur ghost-hunters.
Note: The only significant remains of Mudlavia left are the remnants of the lodge.

Crybaby Bridge

Since this legend is on physical record, here is a detailed account of the legend, dating all the way back to 1973, from a 'Denise Rutledge':
"About two miles from my house on a back road, there's a big cement bridge going over a creek. It's got three big arches on the bottom, then you can go upstairs on the side and go in the top of the bridge. And off to the side there's a little white wooden shanty, sitting back off the road in the woods. They say that in the civil war, this woman was married to a rebel soldier. His family lived in or around Plainfield. And she got pregnant and was going to have a baby, and she went up to live with her husband's mother. And his mother had always resented that her son had married a southerner. The mother-in-law just sort of well, she just gradually went insane, acting strange and tried to take over caring for the baby. She started mistreating the girl, and then mistreating th baby, and the girl wanted to get away. And the mother-in-law seemed to be guarding the girl, keeping her close to the house, and not letting her talk to anyone. The girl was really scared. So one night she decided she just had to get away. And in the back of the house, there's the dense woods, so she couldn't go that way. The only thing she could do was to go across the creek. So she got up one night, and she was wearing a long white robe and everything, and she wrapped the baby up in blankets and took off. It had rained a lot and the creek was high. So she figured all she could do was go up the steps and across the bridge. She went up the steps and was so worried about being found out or followed, what she would do when she did get over the bridge, and she didn't think and she went all the way to the top where the railroad tracks are, and started to walk along the railroad tracks. Her foot got stuck, and a train came, and she tried to pull her foot out but lost her balance, and she dropped the baby. And the baby cried. She made it and she jumped down and hung on to the edge of the tracks, and crawled in one of the lower arches. But it's said now that sometimes in the night when it's real still, if you go to the haunted bridge, you can hear a baby cry, and you can see the woman in white up at the top looking over the edge calling for her baby."

Now, this is really interesting to me, because the modern telling of the story is that a woman got into a car accident and she died, leaving her baby behind on the bridge. However this is the oldest telling of the legend that I could find, and the most detailed. I'm not really sure where the car accident came from, maybe a copycat of a similarly named bridge, because there are multiple 'Crybaby Bridges.' However, this one is about a woman and her baby who were trapped by an abusive mother-in-law, who tried to escape. The story doesn't end with her dying there which is strange, as it's a ghost story about her haunting it, so it's unclear if the woman actually got away, or if she did end up dying there on the bridge when the train passed. Or maybe she just got away entirely, and the story she told was so memorable that the idea was spread that someone had died there in the story and resulted in the legend.

Lover's Leap

Lover's Leap is a cliff with a very steep drop. I've also been here, and looked over the edge. The legend of this place is a Romeo and Juliet style story, where two young lovers from two different tribes were not allowed to be together. Because there was no way for them to be with eachother, they decided to die together, and jumped off of the cliff to commit suicide. A lot of other stories of suicide have also risen, and I don't doubt that at least some of them are real.
It's considered haunted because it's a suicide spot.

The Hatchet Man

The story goes that at the time, there was a serial rapist/serial killer/(whatever, depending on whatever you decide to make up,) on the loose, and a couple of dorm girls were told to isolate to their dorm room to stay safe. One of the girls decided she wanted to go out anyway, so she did, and the next morning, the girl wakes to find that her room-mate had been violently murdered outside of the dorm room. There were bloody scratch marks on the door, as if she was so terrified that she was trying to claw her way back in. After this had happened, all the girls were required to stay in one dorm during the holidays. (Which was actually true, until the early 70s.) Nearly every telling of the story is different and there is no solid foundation to it, so I doubt there's any connection of truth to the actual story at all, unlike some other urban legends. It was likely completely fabricated as a fun spooky story, and not even a very creative one at that.